Monday, May 21, 2007

safeway's non-express lanes...

so the brilliant minds behind the customer service desk at the adams morgan safeway, the same people who brought you the "let's not have more than one, maybe two cashiers on monday evenings" have unveiled another brilliant scheme for shoppers: the "every lane is an express lane."
now, it used to be that a few lanes near the doors were express (15 items or less) which is where most of us turn to with that one box of brown sugar, the late night ice cream craving or sunday morning's bloody mix. there's no room for a cart, you just drop your stuff on the rolling mat and you could hopefully be out in a few minutes. most times, you don't even scan your safeway club card, because you don't care, you just want to be out of this store already. well now, according to the new colorful signs dangling in the breeze, EVERY lane at the safeway is express.
yup, every. single. one of them.
and you don't need to be a rocket surgeon to figure out that it inherently makes evrey lane the UN-express lane because now, the guy who buys all the swanson's bratwursts when they're on sale (i've seen him. he ruined my sausage party) gets to hold up any lane he chooses. why safeway, why? do you think this will make everyone's life faster, smoother? it does not. and this is one of the few exceptions in life where segregration must be upheld (unisex bathrooms make me cringe). this is not some bohemian one world, one people philosophy or something, this needs to be stopped. as long as taco sauce remains in the international aisle, separate our aisles. because this all-embracing free for all does no one any service. even the aisle that on sunday morning read: "checks, cash, credit card ONLY"

5 comments:

kris said...

em effers. i hate this kind of thing -- at least all the express lines aren't self checkout -- the complete idiocy of folks trying to use those things trumps any other supermarket horror for me.

KMAX said...

I was there last night waiting as well in those damn lines. I will say that while both lines were essentially at a stand still and I was standing still back in the cheese section, the true "express" line did move "faster" then mine which would usually be a normal line... ("faster" though of sourse is a relative term).

Janet said...

the only thing redeeming about a visit to that Safeway is that you have time to read an entire USWeekly while waiting in line. I basically just count on being there for an hour and feel lucky if I get out early.

lefty said...

yeah, i'm all up to date on brangelina now - on the covers of US, People AND star weekly. i'm a huge fan of the self checkout tho. if there was a reality show about amateur supermarket scanners - i would be walking away with that million dollars. i know all the produce codes! and i can tell the difference between onions and shallots! (and i like to scan hydroponic organic tomatoes as idaho potatoes. $1.15 a lb.) YESSSSS

mmafan said...

Safeway is a JOKE, period, be they in the District, MD or VA. I've become a loyal Giant shopper. Giant gets crowded, but at least the lanes are open and lines move fast. I think the self checkout helps as well. Sure..Patience is a virtue, but waiting 20-30 minutes in a checkout line is insane.