alice took me to a fancy italian restaurant on the beach....3 times. it has a 34 page menu. every combination of pasta and sauce and pizza or calzone. all homemade. i order the local pumpkin-like thing ravioli. don't have it. ok, meat then? all we have is fish ravioli. ummmmmmm. the gnochi? no gnochi today. i'll take the asparagus pizza then. no asparagus. we go through pretty much the whole menu when finally, i say, how about you just replace the asparagus on the pizza with mushrooms? or, you can add mushrooms to the regular pizza, it's the same thing (cheaper).
at this point the waiter's head explodes. he has no idea how to handle this. so i get a calzone. it's huge. it's awesome. there are loud italians drinking peroni behind us. the waves are crashing on the beach. yummy.